Have you ever felt that the real you isn’t finding full expression daily? Maybe at times, you do act in such a way that seems wild or old to you, especially in certain situation? You actually know that is not you. The real you wouldn’t have acted that way. The real you wouldn’t have spoken like that.
This is the struggle so many people face daily; leaving them to frustration and boredom. The challenges with many people is that they allow themselves to be trapped and caged in another person’s body, all because they want to be like the person.
I have heard people say; ‘I love the way he talks, I want to talk like him, I love the kind of message he preaches, I want to preach the same way just like him. I love this and that about him and I want to be everything that he is.’ Allow me to shock you a little, the above instance isn’t a desire for exploit, it is a mediocre mentality, which figuratively place bars of iron around the person with such mindset.
Some might ask, does it mean looking unto someone or having a mentor is a bad idea? This is absolutely not. Mentorship is a very good idea. There is nothing wrong with mentoring. However, my only concern is with the mentor. The mentors who want there mentee to be like them. This is absolutely wrong,unethical, unscriptural and does not portray the beauty of our society.
Regardless of the cadre or the height you might have attained on the societal strata, in whatsoever sphere of life; leadership, politics, religion, career, etc. Never mentor people to act like you. You will only imprison them by doing so.
Mentors are meant to help their mentee discover their true self and not to teach them to speak, act or behave like there Mentors. A mentor is not meant to make a public show of his/her mentee weakness in what the mentor himself has strength for, so that the mentor would appear to the public eyes as though the strongest or most disciplined.
As a mentor, you are to establish the feet of your mentee on the right path and also lead them through this path, not a matter of coercion or “do as I do” attitude. Help open their eyes to their own destiny, not making them walk in yours. Our purpose might be similar but our destiny aren’t. We might both be called a preacher but we aren’t meant to preach the same message. We might both be called a writer but we aren’t writing for the same audience.
Mr Mentor, they don’t have to speak like you, act like you, or even eat like you (as some mentor desires). If everybody becomes like you, where is the beauty of God’s creation in that. There is beauty in diversity.
Teaching a fish to climb the tree will only keep the fish in struggle for the rest of its life. Why not free the fish of its struggle by allowing it to find where best suit it and establish it rightly there as a mentor that you are.
We are to do greater things than our mentor, not the same thing as they did. If your mentor could walk on water, who said you can’t fly in the air.
Don’t limit yourself. You have a in you a great light, wanting to shine. Please let it shine.
© 2016 ABAIRE OLAWALE